Hello and welcome to the eleventh edition of Getting Teamwork Right!

One of the most common reasons that I am asked to work with a team is because they are suffering from toxic conflict. This can be very damaging and cause a lot of problems within teams, and it is very difficult for them to resolve on their own. This episode we are going to look at what is toxic conflict, how can you prevent it, and what can you do if it shows up in your team.

One important thing to note, though, is that conflict is necessary within teams but good positive conflict and not poor toxic conflict. Healthy passionate debate, discussion, and interaction is where you get creativity, decision-making, and exploration of things within the team. Don't think all conflict is bad!

In this newsletter I will explain about the Four Horsemen of Toxic Communication. I use this with just about every team I work with in some capacity. It's really useful information to be able to break down and understand what is often a very emotionally charged subject. I hope you find this newsletter useful and if you are having difficulty with the Toxic Horsemen, let me know if I can help.

The Four Horsemen of Team Breakdown: How to Spot Them Before They Take Hold

Criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling don't just end marriages, they end teams too. This post explains Gottman's Four Horsemen and how to recognise them before they take hold in your team.

The Four Horsemen

A closer look at Gottman's Four Horsemen and how they show up in team settings, not just relationships. Watch this before your next difficult conversation.

How to Turn the Four Horsemen Around Before They Sink Your Team

Spotting the Four Horsemen is only half the job. This post gives you practical antidotes for each one, so your team can turn destructive patterns into honest, constructive conflict.

Try This With Your Team This Week

Next time disagreement surfaces in a meeting, don't rush to smooth it over. Ask: 'what's the version of this we're not saying out loud?' That question alone often unlocks the real conversation.

Ask Andy

Do you have a question that I can help you with? Send it to me on the link below and I will answer it. I'd like to publish one answer every fortnight — so that any readers with a similar concern can benefit. I will ask if you are OK for me to use your question, and I will make you and your situation anonymous before I share it.

Book a Call

If you want to find out more about how we could help your team or organisation, I'd love to hear from you. You can book a Microsoft Teams call with me here: